Lust vs. Love: Why So Many People Get It Wrong

By Enakaye Peculiar

Most people think they understand the difference between lust and love—until they experience it. In a world driven by fast emotions, instant attraction, and social media influence, it’s easy to mistake intensity for something deeper. What feels powerful in the moment is often labeled as love, when in reality, it may just be a temporary desire.

Lust thrives on urgency. It’s about the rush, the excitement, and the fantasy you build around someone. You focus on how they look, how they make you feel, and the thrill of having them. But the problem is, lust rarely asks important questions. It doesn’t care about values, character, or long-term compatibility—it just wants the feeling to continue.

Love, on the other hand, is slower and more intentional. It requires patience and attention. Instead of creating a perfect image of someone, love sees reality—and chooses to stay anyway. It values connection over excitement and understanding over assumptions. Love is not always loud or dramatic, but it is steady and real.

One major reason people get it wrong is because lust can feel just as intense as love in the beginning. The butterflies, the constant thoughts about someone, the desire to be around them—it all feels convincing. But intensity is not proof of depth. Real love reveals itself over time, especially when challenges appear and the excitement fades.

In the end, the difference comes down to foundation. Lust is built on feelings that can change quickly, while love is built on connection that can grow stronger. If you don’t take time to understand what you’re feeling, you risk building something serious on something temporary. And that’s where most people get it wron

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